CREWS' VIEWS

Sharing the Ham

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 11:39:00 +0000

GEORGE

As Senior Cat I have certain privileges in our house and one of them is being close to the action. In this case the sandwich-making action.

What are we having today, Dad?

Hmmm... I see you got some fresh ham at the deli. But don't you think I should check it out? You know....to be sure it's safe for you & Mom to eat!

(nomnomnomnom)

Excellent choice, Dad. But if you don't mind, I'll have a little on a plate.

Tipper, why are you by my plate?! I'm Senior Cat here, not you!

TIPPER

You don't own all the ham in this house!!

Dad said I could have some so you have to share with me.

Frozen Tundra

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 15:06:00 +0000

Rules for Shasta

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 11:13:00 +0000

GEORGE

Recently I told you our human sister's dog, Shasta, is going to be living here for a while. And I said I'd put together a list of rules I expect her to obey. I've given this a lot of thought and want to thank everycat for your great suggestions.

I'm ready to dictate my list, Mom. Mom...are you ready?

MOM

Yes Georgie, go ahead.

GEORGE

Good. This list will be similar to the one I made for our former Blurpy-now-Sticky Girl when she was born but more strict. I mean, we are dealing with a DAWG here, not a human!!

RULES FOR SHASTA

1. This is my house and I'm Senior Cat which means I am the boss here. I run a tight ship and don't put up with any nonsense. And remember, there are 3 other cats here who are also your bosses. Well, maybe not Misty 'cause she's younger than you.

2. Don't look at me, touch me or try to talk to me, and for heaven's sake, no barking when I'm napping. Please remember, I nap at least 18 hours a day.

3. No stealing our food. Mom will put our feeder up on the kitchen table so you can't get at it. This is a major inconvenience because now we have to jump up there to eat. Regarding the water bowl, don't leave any of your germs in it.

4. Mom bought you dog toys so don't bother our toys. You have (Mom, I'm sorry, but I need to say one of the bad words here) "dog breth" and we don't want your icky dog slobber on our toys, either.

5. Don't bother our litterboxes. Absolutely (ugh) NO EATING out of the boxes will be allowed. When you need to answer nature's call, don't do anything on our floor where we have to look at it, or smell it. Be civilized and take your business outside.

6. I usually nap on either Dad's lap or Mom's lap in the evening. If I want a lap and you're on it, you will vacate that lap immediately. Once I'm on the lap, don't even think about trying to lay anywhere near me.

7. No jumping on the big bed or any sofa or chair if I'm up there. The same goes for Max who can usually be found napping near me. If Misty or Tipper want to lay near you, please work that out with them directly.

8. No chasing us. We don't like it.

9. If we have to pass each other in the hall or kitchen, I will ignore you and you will yield the right of way to me.

10. There might be an occasion where I find it necessary to whap you if you intrude into my space. Please refer to Rule #1 and remember, I am Senior Cat here.

OK, I think that's about it, Mom. Please print several copies and put one in every room where Shasta will walk, preferably down at her eye level so she doesn't miss it!

2 for Mancat Monday

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 11:07:00 +0000

MAX

Mom!! Enough with the flashy box already. We're trying to get a nap here!

MOM

That's all you boys do is nap.

MAX

Wrong!!

That's so not tru...mmphh...not tr...not...mmm...zzzz...zzzzz.

Shasta is Coming

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 12:16:00 +0000

GEORGE

I don't know what to think about the news I heard today.

You all know I'm not a big fan of dogs. Nothing personal, all you dogs out there. It's just that I get very tense and I don't like all the barking, jumping and intrusion into my personal space. Maybe if I'd had a chance to grow up with a dog I'd feel differently about them. I don't know.

Anyway, today I heard that our human sister B's dog, Shasta, shown here, is coming to live with us for a while. Shasta is a 4 1/2 year old Bichon Frise. Her adopted dog sister Reyna, a 2 year old Labra-Doodle, has been trying to eat her and...

MOM

Not eat her, George. Reyna just wants to play and won't leave Shasta alone for a minute! She's young and big and her parents want to give Shasta a break for a while. She won't be here forever.

GEORGE

She'd better not be!!

All I know is, for some weird reason, Tipper and Misty like her and Misty will even share lap space with her. As for Max and me, we intend to ignore her.

And, while she's here, I expect her to follow my rules. I'll be putting together a list and will dictate it before she gets here!

A "clean" Explanation

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 11:45:00 +0000

MISTY

This is our bath tub. It's where humans stand under water to get dirts and smells off them. When they come out, they wipe themselves all over with a big towel and then they're clean. I've seen Mom do this many times.

Sometimes when Dad stands in here, he sings. Then Mom says "Don't quit your day job".

I don't know what that means 'cause when I take a bath I don't stand under water and I don't sing.

New Member

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 18:02:00 +0000

GEORGE

We have a new member at Coats of Many Colors. Members, won't you go over and welcome him! Even though he lives in Portugal, he speaks English too.

Anycat interested in joining our group, please let me know and you 'll get our official group membership badge to add to your sidebar. We're open to all cats, bi-, tri- and solid color.

Start NOW!!!

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 11:09:00 +0000

GEORGE

Friends, remember it's only a few more weeks until Santa comes.

I suggest everyone follow Garfield's example and start cramming. Don't delay any longer. You never know when Santa is watching you!!

Marking Dad

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 11:54:00 +0000

GEORGE

This morning Dad told me he wasn't going directly to work but had to see some people out of the office.

As soon as I heard that I knew it was important to mark him with my scent. You never know who he might meet and if it's other cats, I don't want them thinking my Dad is available, because he isn't!! It's bad enough I have to share him with Mom, Tipper, Max & Misty and I don't want to risk anyone else trying to steal him away.

So I marked him up good, rubbing my scent on his shirt and around his neck and he rewarded me with some good scritches before he left.

I think he'll be safe 'til he gets home.

Happy Thanksgiving

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 11:59:00 +0000

May your stuffing be tasty
May your turkey plump,
May your potatoes and gravy
Have never a lump.
May your yams be delicious
And your pies take the prize.
And may your Thanksgiving dinner
Stay off your thighs!

(author unknown)

The Crew and family wish everycat and their family a happy & safe Thanksgiving.

I've Got Game

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 11:59:00 +0000

GEORGE

While Dad was watching the Packer's game this weekend, Mom and I had a quick game of "feather".

Do you like my paw action? At 12 1/2 I'm a Senior Catizen but, there's no doubt about it, I've still got game!

I think this one shows off my Mancatly toes and claws especially well, don't you?

Here, let me show you a closeup. See how each toe is defined and my claws are ready to grab the feath...hey, wait a minute...my claws! Only one of them is razor sharp!!

Mom...did you trim my claws while I was sleeping?!

Sisterly Help

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 11:43:00 +0000

MISTY

Tipper, I'm so sleepy I'm sliding off the cushion. Could you hold me up?

TIPPER

Sure, let me just get behind your ear here and prop up your head a little. How's this?

MISTY

Much better, thanks.

Purrfurmance Review 2009

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 11:42:00 +0000

GEORGE

Alright...now THIS is a great idea!! Thanks to Maggie & Zoey over at Zoolatry for providing just what we all need to bring our humans into line. I urge everycat to do your performance review during the month of November.

I've been complaining and complaining about my secretary's (aka Mom) poor performance for 4 years now, but did it do any good? Did she listen to any of my suggestions? Did she try to improve? More importantly, did she quit her day job, as I suggested, to devote more time to our blogging needs? NO!!!

Thanks to this handy form, now I can show her, on paper, just where I feel she needs to improve her work.

Quantity of Output - The review suggests daily posting to our blog, but we're lucky if our secretary posts two or three times a week. This is unacceptable and must improve - Rating C

Quality of Output - Overall I'm fairly satisfied with the subject matter, photos, etc., but feel the imagination and fun part needs work. For instance, we haven't run a contest in over 2 years! - Rating C

Pawticipation I - We're Catster members and can easily be contacted by clicking on our blog sidebar email link or by comment - Rating A

Pawticipation II - I think we participate in only about 1/3 of everything fun that happens in The Cat Blogosphere. We don't take part in nearly enough contests or special events and who even remembers the last time we went to a party! Plus, you're not spending nearly enough time promoting my group, Coats of Many Colors - Rating D-

Client Satisfaction - We average between 10-25 comments per posting, but there's always room for improvement and an increase in readers - Rating B-

I want to add another very important section to my review --"Visiting friends and commenting".

Visiting/Commenting - Here is where you need improvement, Mom. Some days we only visit a few friends to leave comments and some days we don't get out to visit ANY! - Rating D

Overall Rating - Based on the above, your rating is a low "C" and needs real improvement.

Your nearly failing grades in two sections brought down your overall average and I would like you to try hard to bring your average up to at least a solid "B" before your next review. In view of your mediocre rating, there will be no pay raise this year and the entire Crew will be watching you closely, in between our naps of course.

MOM

Don't you think this is a bit harsh, George? I mean, I do read TCB news every day to keep up on current events. And remember, I have a few health issues, I work full time, I take care of you 4 and Dad plus a big house & yard and sometimes I go to your sisters to help out with our Girl!

GEORGE

No excuses!! If other secretary's can do it, so can you.

But....on second thought, I might be inclined to improve your grade to a C+ in exchange for, oh let's say.... a daily ration of treats, and not just for myself, but for the entire Crew. And not just one flavor, either...a variety would be nice.

Claw Story

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 11:18:00 +0000

CLAW STORY
a one act play by
Maxwell Smartkitty

The Ensemble: (in order of appearance)
Mom - Mom
Dad - Dad
George - Georgie Pie
Max - Maxwell Smartkitty
Tipper - Tipper Doodle
Misty - Misty Everpurr

The Setting:
5:00AM. The dark bedroom of a suburban Whisk-onsin house.

As the scene opens we see two humans in a big bed. Mom is lying on her left side, snuggled under the quilt against the morning chill. Dad gets up and leaves the room. The door is left ajar. Within seconds cats enter the room and jump onto the bed. First is George, an elderly, sometimes cranky, white & gray harlequin, who immediately demands to be under the cover. We see Mom lift the blanket and George settles in against her chest, purring loudly.

Then we see Max, the magnificent, black & white tuxie, who first checks on the location of his beloved brother. Once satisfied that all is well, Max settles his 20 lb. weight on Mom's shoulder with his pristinely white, Mancatly front paws extended. Mom reaches up to pet his head.

Mom: How's my handsome tuxie boy?

Max: I'm good.

We see two other cats, Tipper and Misty, both gray & white female tuxies, enter and settle at the foot of the bed.

Max, having made himself comfortable on Mom's shoulder, flexes his huge toes, extends his razor sharp claws and begins to knead on the side of Mom's face and head.

Mom: Ouch!

Max: (purr purr purr knead knead knead)

Mom: Ow...Max!!

Max: Sorry. (purr purr purr knead knead knead)

Meanwhile George has made his way under the quilt and is in the crook of Mom's knee. Max realizes his brother is no longer against Mom's chest and, being the concerned brother that he is, stops kneading, gets up, turns and walks down the length of Mom's body to find him. Once he finds the George lump, Max is satisfied but for good measure he hisses at Misty, his annoying, top-shelf-stealing little sister, (yes I know about that, Misty) then walks up Mom's body and re-settles his considerable weight on her shoulder.

Mom: Max, settle down.

Max: I needed to find George.

Mom: Fine, you found him. Now go to sleep.

Max again begins kneading on Mom's face and head, more forcefully than before.

Max: (purr purr purr knead knead knead)

Mom: Ow! Max...claws!!

Max: Sorry. I got a little carried away.

Mom: Well, stop it.

Max, who is now really into his kneading, digs into the quilt, Mom's nightgown, neck, ears and head, catching his claws in her hair.

Mom: Max...CLAWS!!!

Max, busy with his kneading, pays no attention to Mom's pleas.

Mom: OW!!! STOP IT!

Mom shrugs her shoulder and Max slides part way off, but gets right back on.

Max: Sorry Mom. I guess I don't realize my own strength.

Mom: OK...calm down now.

Max begins to knead more gently but when one claw punctures Mom's skin, she cries out in pain.

Mom: OWW!!!! That's it. You're getting a claw trim today.

Upon hearing this, Max, who hates claw trims, leaps off the bed in one mighty bound and rushes from the room.

Max: No way! I'm outta here.

The End

Explaining a Bald Birdie

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 11:03:00 +0000

MISTY

See this? It's a fake birdie house and a fake real birdie used to sit on the corner there. Now all that's left are a few feathers where the birdie was sitting. But I want to say right now, this wasn't my fault...none of it! It's Mom's fault and I'll explain how I know this.

The birdie on the birdie house was on a shelf in the upstairs bathroom. Mom wants to paint that room so Dad took down the shelf and Mom set the shelf and birdie house with the birdie on it in the hallway.

Well, I was minding my own business when I happened by and saw the birdie sitting on it's house. Of course I had to sniff it and touch it with my paw 'cause I thought it was a real birdie, but then I found out it was a fake birdie with real feathers. Then somehow, while I was sniffing it, my mouth got on it and I might have put the bitey on it, but just a little, 'cause you all know how much I like feathers, 'specially on my feather-butt mousies, and I wanted to see if those birdie feathers were real or fake.

Then, you know, one thing lead to another and I'm not really sure what happened next 'cause it happened so fast, but suddenly the birdie wasn't sitting on it's house any more. I think it fell down the stairs so I ran downstairs to play wi...uh, I mean, to see if it was alright. Then the weirdest thing of all happened 'cause while I was looking at it, the feathers started falling off, almost all by themselves, and the birdie was bald!!

Well, when Mom got home from work she found feathers all over the floor and she looked around 'til she found the bald birdie and then she blamed ME, just because I happened to be sitting in the same room. But, as I've explained, I was an innocent bystander!

You can all see how this is Mom's fault, right? If she had put the birdie house away instead of leaving it in the hallway, I wouldn't have found it and the birdie wouldn't have fallen off it's house and it's feather's wouldn't have fallen off either and the birdie wouldn't be bald. You all think I'm completely innocent, right?

Helping Dad

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 11:59:00 +0000

MISTY

Usually Max or George help him with manly stuff but today I'm helping Dad. Here I am checking out the heater pipe in the upstairs bedroom while Dad is trying to find out why it's so cold up here!

Aaacckkkk! Oh no!! Somebody, come quick! There's water coming out and Mom will be mad if the rug gets wet.

GEORGE

Get out of the way, Mist!!! I need to take a look at this right away.

No doubt Dad will want my advice on how to handle this problem.

Meatloaf Mancat Monday

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 11:16:00 +0000

GEORGE

Here we are...two brothers... practicing our meatloaf positions on the big bed.

MAX

Is "meatloaf" a yoga position? Hmmm...I'm not sure.

Maybe we should check with Skittles (aka Mrs. Slycat). Everycat knows she's the The Cat Blogosphere's best yoga teacher.

4th Blogiversary

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 11:50:00 +0000

MISTY

Tomorrow is our 4th blogiversary and I want to talk about it. Here is a link to The Crew's first post. I'm 3 1/2 years old now so that means George, Tipper & Max were blogging for six months before I was even born! George was 8, Tipper was 2 1/2 and Max was only 18 months old when they started blogging.

You know when humans have a wedding anniversary there are things that mean something special for each year. Like paper is for the 1st anniversary, silver is for the 25th, and gold is for the 50th. Well, Mom helped me look up what the thing is for a 4th anniversary and it's "floral". That means flowers and we found out that the 4th anniversary flower is a geranium. Since lots of geraniums are pink, which is my color, I'm very happy that I can show a picture of them.

So much has happened since The Crew started blogging. Dad broke his leg and had a surgery, I found my forever home when I was adopted from the shelter, our human sister B got married and 2 years later we had a part y for the showering ladies before her blurpy girl was born. I was very happy when I found true love with my handsome mancat, Speedy. Soon after that Mattingly declared his love for Tipper and Max won the heart of Mattingly's sister Harlie. Then there was my terrible ordeal (shudders) when I swallowed thread and had to have a surgery on my insides. Mom & Dad have done a lot to fix up our house to make it look nice too, like when we built the new dec k, remodeled the bathroo m and put a wood floor in the living room.

We just love blogging and have so much fun. If there isn't anything interesting happening at our house, there's always something happening somewhere in The Cat Blogosphere -- parties, contests, purrthdays, Gotcha Days and weddings, too! We've shared tears of sadness, laughed over joyous news and learned so much about how kitties live all over the world. We've met many wonderful kitties and their families and we love you all.

Won't you take a glass and join us in a toast...a toast to our 4th blogiversary and to cat blogging!!

2009 Purr for Peace

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 08:08:00 +0000

Kitties everywhere, continue purrin' for peace.

Widebody Brother Wednesday

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 11:21:00 +0000

MAX

Mom, I know I'm the bigger brother but how come I look so much wider than George now?

MOM

Because you are wider. You're the biggest cat I've ever seen! I can barely lift you any more.

MAX

But big is good, right? Big paws, big tail, big tum....uh, I mean, big furs.

Move over a little George. My bigness needs more room to spread out.

Mancat Coolness on the Phone

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 11:33:00 +0000

GEORGE

Do you remember when I was debating whether I should get a cell phone, but then decided against it? Well, Dad lost his cell phone recently so he got a new one that takes pictures. And yes, I know you're thinking "But George, EVERYONE has phones that take pictures". That's right...everyone 'cept my Dad. He's kind of old fashioned that way.

Anyway, to fix up his new phone, Mom put some pictures of our former Blurpy, soon-to-be Sticky Girl on it and of course, pictures of ME! Now I can go everywhere with Dad and when he sees people during the day, instead of just telling them about me, he can show me!! I'll get to ride in the car, go to meetings, eat lunch out and even fly on airplanes. This is all very cool, don't you think?!

Here I am on his new phone.

Happy Halloween

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 10:02:00 +0000

MISTY

We wish everycat a safe Halloween.

Remember to stay indoors tomorrow 'cause, believe it or not, Mom says there are bad people out there who might deliberately harm us, 'specially House Panthers. We don't want any of our friends to be hurt.

And if a blurpy or sticky person offers you chocolate, just say NO! Chocolate and candy wrappers can make us kitties, and dogs too, very sick.

The Kitty Eat Hat II

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 09:54:00 +0000

TIPPER

Remember when Mattingly & Harlie's Mom sent our girl a kitty-ear hat and we showed a picture of her wearing it?

Well, here she is again, now 14 1/2 months old, wearing it. I'm glad her hat is gray with pink ears, like me.

Congratulations Miss Peach & Mickey

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 10:46:00 +0000

After many delays, the lovely Miss Peach, and her handsome fiance Mickey will be married on October 31. We wish them much love and happiness.

Knowing how much the bride loves flowers and the cottage look, when we saw this beautiful hand-carved bed and pillow we knew it was the perfect gift. May the happy couple spend many years of wedded bliss resting in their marriage bed.

Map Yourself

noreply@blogger.com (The Crew) — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:24:00 +0000

For any cat who might not have seen the news over at The Cat Blogosphere, Freya has found a way for us all to map where we live.

Good work Freya!! Mom tried to do it a while back, but couldn't find a way.

Go here to add yourself to the world map. You'll find us in Brookfield, Whisk-onsin, USA.